3-26-12

I sat in the living room the other day with my five year old and watched 'The Wizard of Oz ' for his first time. I seen this look of awe and wonderment on his face and I felt so blessed to have that moment with him. It is literally the first time in days that he seemingly has sit still. I have been concerned quite a bit that he is experiencing some issues. I noticed that he is drawing a fair bit of his letters backwards and sometimes his behavior makes me think that he might be mildly autistic. It makes me sad to say that I mean no one wants to say hey there might be something wrong with my kid... but I am planning on talking to his doctor about it the next time that we go into the office.
For a five year old, he is pretty amazing. His imagination moves at light speeds and he is full of life. I am hoping with the warmer weather and the opportunity to run out the bulk of his energy during the day that he will be calmer and more manageable in the evenings. It has been really upsetting to my husband that he will flat out defy him and then turn to ask me what he should be doing. I try to reinforce that he must listen to my husband as well but it goes in one ear and out the other.
Not to mention that even though he may ask me what he how he should behave he ultimately does as he pleases despite what I say. I have tried having him repeat back to me what I ask of him - which he will do... but he still does the exact opposite. I don't force him to, but he refuses to hold eye contact and flutters around on the floor flailing his arms and what not as if he is in his own little world. If you attempt to hold his attention or to control him in anyway he simply melts into a tantrum of defiance and refuses to the point of total meltdown. Mean face, fisted handed, stomping feet, screaming, crying.. you name it. In my own ways I am trying to combat this behavior. I plead with him that it is I that needs his help... "Please hold my hand while we cross the street Gavin, Mommy is so scared when you don't hold my hand" This usually works and is not totally untrue. It scares the shit out of me to see my child run into traffic. I have a hard time lying to him.. well to anyone really. It's too much to maintain...and kids don't seem to forget anything... unless we are counting the rules! lol
I do not want to end up being one of those parents that medicates my child unnecessarily. I am trying to exhaust every possible measure that I can to get reins on him before I resort to that. There is so much about him that is enjoyable and so I try to focus on that and keep him more engaged so that he has less time to let his imagination run away with him or create in is head scenarios where misbehavior might become amusing. I am not always successful at this!